1. Jesus Christ and the
angels threw down Satan and his demons to the neighbourhood of our earth!
Not directly, of course; for
Jesus Christ is now enthroned at God’s right hand in the heavens, impossible
for the nations to reach even by space ships. After his kingdom was born in the
heavens in 1914, he at once began ruling in the midst of his enemies. He cast
Satan the Devil and his demon angels out of heaven and down to the neighborhood
of our earth, never to return to the heavens of God’s holy organization.
The “Watchtower”, January 15, 1962, p. 46
Comment; It seems that Christ and
the angels had better anti-aircraft weapons systems!
2. Jehovah he will survey the battlefield of
Har–Magedon and the enemy battle lines!
According to the way that
Jehovah has acted long ago under given circumstances, he will survey the
battlefield of Har–Magedon and take note of the deployment of the enemy battle
lines.
The “Watchtower”, December 15, 1973, p. 753
Comment; Present Arms!...
3. A married woman who wants to pierce her ears, should ask her husband!
A married woman who favors
having her ears pierced should rightly consult her husbandly head first.
The “Watchtower”, May 15, 1974, p. 319
Comment; To put lipstick should ask
the … best man?
4. No man has seen, to operate the vocal organs of Jehovah!
Consequently, no human of
flesh and blood has ever been able to see Jehovah’s speech organs in operation,
but some humans have heard his voice.
The “Watchtower”, April 15, 1960, p. 255
Comment; They are driving us mad! In
a while they will tell us that God has and ... genitals too!
5. JWs should be washed and bathed, to be
clean and the Organization!
Therefore, if you are a
dedicated servant of Jehovah, it is important for you to see that you are
washed and bathed, that you are neatly dressed in clean clothing, that you look
respectable and presentable before you engage in the witness work or before you
go to the Kingdom Hall. Thus onlookers who are watching will recognize even by
your personal appearance that this is God’s clean organization.—2 Cor.
7:1.
The “Watchtower”, August 15, 1960, p. 506
Comment; Do the nails have to be cut,
and manicure done as well?
6. God was not there to ask him, Adam!
She offered him the forbidden
fruit, in verification of her own sin. Then Adam faced his first marriage
problem! God was not there to ask.
The “Watchtower”, November 1, 1960, p. 655
Comment; Probably would have gone
for ... vacations!
7. The sex organs are not to be treated as
playthings!
Accordingly, God created man
and woman with sex organs for a wonderful purpose in harmony with the divine
will. These sex organs are therefore not to be treated as playthings, nor are
they to be abused, misused or misapplied.
The “Watchtower”, November 15, 1960, p. 678
Comment; Why, is there a possibility
to ... stretched out?
8. The angels are not like children for errands!
And then there are the great
body of angels or spirit messengers. We are not to think of these merely as
errand boys but as agents and deputies, not only serving as a means of
communication but also carrying out God’s purpose, be it the protection and
deliverance of his people or the destruction of the wicked.
The “Watchtower”, January 15, 1961, p. 57
Comment; Hey kid, bring me, two beers!
9. The angels travel
at tremendous speeds!
We may also safely conclude
that angels, God’s spirit messengers, travel at tremendous speeds.
The “Watchtower”, January 15, 1961, p. 58
Comment; It seems to have turbo
engines!
10. The Holy Spirit is like electricity!
In this respect holy spirit
from Jehovah has been likened to electricity, which may serve for illumination,
or as a means of communication, or as a powerful force accomplishing great
amounts of work.
The “Watchtower”, July 15, 1961, p. 433
Comment; If the fuse blows, what are we
doing? No fuse, no electricity?
11. Chase JWs with the broom!
What if the people would not
listen? What if they did slam the door in my face or chase me with a broom?
The “Watchtower”, July 15, 1961, p. 438
Comment; And the dustpan, you forgot the dustpan!
12. JWs were being tarred and feathered!
I learned a lot from these
veterans in Jehovah’s service. They had just come out of Nevada
The “Watchtower”, April 1, 1960, p. 214
Comment; It was with them and Lucky
Luke with Daltons
13. God invented the grammar! God is the greatest Grammarian!
He created all their vocal
powers, to speak their language with the appropriate grammatical style. He
invented their grammar for them. God is the greatest Grammarian.
The “Watchtower”, November 15, 1969, p. 683
Comment; And the Satan, invented the
Mathematics!
14. JWs asks the Organization if you need to take painkillers!
Questions From Readers
● Is it wrong for a Christian to use a painkiller, since Jesus at his impalement refused wine mixed with a painkiller?
The “Watchtower”, March 15, 1978, p. 32
Comment; I want to make a gargle for
sore throat! I must ask the JWs Organization?
15. In 1914 became a real fight in the
Heavens, between angels and demons!
That this conflict was a real
fight can be seen from Daniel 10:13, which tells of an instance where one of
God’s angels was held up for twenty-one days by one of Satan’s demons.—Rev.
12:7-9.
The “Watchtower”, May 15, 1960, pp. 311 – 312
Comment; How many were killed and
wounded, angels and demons?
16. The transfusing blood, will transfer the
personality of the other!
Transfusing blood, then, may
amount to transfusing tainted personality traits.
The “Watchtower”, May 15, 1962, p. 302
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